What started out as a scholarship essay...

Its still raining. 

Which means that I am in the mood to curl up on a corner of my bed with a cup of tea and write. And because I'm planning on going to college next year, the obvious choice of writing is scholarships. Sadly, my scholarship essay turned into some sort of journal summary-type thing. So I don't really know what this is. Maybe I can use it for another scholarship sometime (I do love to recycle). Maybe it can just chill here in the depths of cyberspace until I'm 83 and want to remember "life as a young'un". But it is what it is, so here goes:

*********************************************************************

My name is Valerie, and I am writing this application sitting on a squeaky bed (for lack of a desk) in the rainy city of Otavalo, Ecuador.

“How did you get to be here?” is the obvious question, and indeed I sometimes ask it of myself. Last year at this time, a senior at the top of my graduating class, going anywhere outside of college, let alone another country, was out of the question. I wanted to get out of Alaska. I wanted to have new experiences, meet new people, and learn how I could contribute to the world. To me, this ideal future had one label: Get into a University.

And so I applied, I stressed, I scholarshipped, I waited, I angsted, and was finally accepted. Then, I made what I thought was the hardest decision of my life, and enrolled at Lewis and Clark college.

It was about this time that I started thinking about the reality of what I was doing. I love learning, but my senior year was certainly exhausting; did I really want to jump into more studies? I worked diligently over the summer, aware that Lewis and Clark is not economically the easiest choice. Was I ready to give up every break to working to pay for school? I read quotes from my religion, the Baha'i Faith, on the importance of spending a year of my life devoted to service to humanity.

I think it was the quotes that finally did it. And I thought, college will always be there, but right now I am between stages in my life, and can take this opportunity to promote the best interests of the peoples and kindreds of the earth! And I sent in my deferral form, and emailed several countries in South America about giving service there. And a Baha'i school in Ecuador replied, saying they accept volunteer English teachers.

A visa, two suitcases, and lots of hugs later, I was on my way. I was no stranger to travel, having gone to Europe the summer before with a friend, and having lived in Athens, Greece for two years with my family.  This, however, was a big step for independence and took a lot of courage.  I remember groggily walking out of the airport after 24 hours of travel, listening to a then-incomprehensible babble of Spanish and saying a prayer that I would be able to cope with whatever I’d gotten myself into.

That was three months ago, and I love it here. In the short space of three months, I have gained a myriad of aprendizajes. How to cook French fries, disciplining children without being “mean”, and a fluency in Spanish I’d never get in a classroom are certainly things that will help me in life.

Apart from what I’ve learned is the feeling of fulfilment I get from serving. Baha’u’llah, the founder of the Baha'i Faith, said, ““Blessed is he and happy is he that ariseth to promote the best interests of the peoples and kindreds of the earth.” * Sure, I get home from classes, and I’m frustrated with my students and especially my own abilities as a teacher, but when I take a step back from my day-to-day challenges, I truly feel blessed and happy. Service fulfils a spiritual need that I believe we all have, to give and make a positive difference in the world.

Taking a “year off” and coming here was the best decision I’ve made in my life.

Now, I’m thinking about other decisions. One certain effect this year will have for my future is my dedication to service, not only this year, but integrated throughout my life. This realization has led me to meditate on other decisions. I’m thinking about college, and how I want to be able to remain active in the Baha'i community during school. I’m thinking about the dedication of the students here, and I’m thinking about what career I want to pursue, and I’m thinking about how I want to spend my summers in the upcoming 4 years, and…I’m thinking.  I’m praying, too. Because if there’s one thing I know, its that God knows his plan for me, and by praying, maybe I can figure out my plan for me too.

*Gleanings of the Writings of Baha’u’llah

*************************************************************************

So that’s that. And there’s another quote I wanted to share with  you. I came across it when skyping with Emily,  and I really like it:

Service to humanity is service to God. Let the love and light of the Kingdom radiate through you until all who look upon you shall be illumined by its reflection. Be as stars, brilliant and sparkling in the loftiness of their heavenly station.

-`Abdu'l-Baha: Promulgation of Universal Peace

ENFERMEDAD. And some other things.

I should be writing scholarship applications right now. Its that time of year, I just feel like its not because its warm outside.

Wait, did I say warm outside? I guess I meant that relatively. Because I am wearing every jacket I own (except the purple one thats made of cloth and not warm), plus some sweatshirts/shirts. Its rained for the past three days. Luckily, the sun came out today, but I still feel chilled to the bone.

The other reason I'm chilled to the bone is that I've been sick. Don't be alarmed, people, as Mrs. Bennet would say, "People don't die of little trifling colds."* They're just pretty uncomfortable. Although being sick and surrounded by people that wash the dishes every morning (Maryam!) and sing songs in the kitchen (Marlon!) and bake cookies with you (Andy!), and skyping people that you LOVE (Elika! Emily! Parents! Granny and Gramps! Jaron!) is just about as comfortable as you can get (Although I wouldn't say no to Mr. Darcy walking in to inquire after me). Also, I'm sick with about 78% of the population here, no joke. I was plenty well to go to school today (although I sound like a sapo**) and was disgusted, but not surprised, to see 10 runny noses out of my 12 prebasica students (the 2 others were home sick). So my goal is to get better, fast. And take tissues and hand sanitizer to my next prebasica class.

Maryam woke up sick today. And so I took her art class with 2o de basica. We made get well soon cards, which are so cute I'm going to post a photo of them!

Dear Maryam, those are actually hearts.

In other news: I just finished reading el Narración de Nabil IN SPANISH! For those of you that don't know, Nabil's Narrative is a book written by Shogi Effendi on the early history of the Bahai Faith. Its difficult to understand, even in English, because there are lots of Persian names and unfamiliar places, and sometimes the chronology of the story doesn't exactly make sense*** and so in Spanish, its mega-hard. But I feel so accomplished now that I've read all of it! And it has some very inspiring stories, which before I'd only heard parts of. Next week, I believe we're starting Tablets of the Divine Plan, which I am uber excited to study! If only school had been more like Bahai school...I would've actually done my homework more often.

I was talking with my neighbor, José Luis, about where he studied. He's actually still studying, in Quito. But he went to a university in Colombia, which he described as a Bahai university. Apart from getting a degree in literature (He teaches at the school) he took really amazing, intense-sounding Bahai studies classes. And I was like, WOW. That is amazing. I want to do that.

I have the most wonderful neighbors in the world! I actually met another, who lives behind us. Her name is Nancy, and she is also in fact Lovebird #1. She just came and knocked on my door to ask about helping her with her English homework. She's studying in University in Ibarra, a town 20 minutes away.

My other neighbors are brilliant too. I got to share Kendy's 4th birthday with the other youth who are doing service here. This sharing started at 8:00 (on a Sunday!) when he walked into our house and said "Todavia nadie me dijo feliz cumpleaños."**** He spent the morning with us, as we were making his cards and eating breakfast.

Then we went to Ibarra to go shopping. This was fun! I bought new jeans (desperately needed) and then we went to Jugetón, which was a really really cool toy store. It made me forget that I'm legally an adult, and I pretended I was just turning 4 and picked out presents for Kendy (frisbee, beach ball, and those little rubber band animals that go on your wrist). Then we got lunch at KFC (pronounced Ka Effe Se) and returned home for cake.

And then we went to Feast together. I love this family!

In other news: Maryam and I decorated the "Choza" for our Holy Day celebration of the Birth of Baha'u'llah. We used lots and lots of roses, which are very cheap here! Here's some photos of our work: 

We made the sign with Kendy

The floor of the choza, decorated with rose petals

Maryam's beautiful work on the door

And two last photos to share:

Every Sunday, Maryam and I go to a community (we have yet to remember its name) and teach a children's class. These are very uplifting! I brought my camera this time and they were all very excited to take photos. We were in a tiny room outside of the school, you can tell by the surroundings that it was very simple, but definitely better than the pouring rain outside! It just goes to show that children's classes can be taught literally anywhere, with very limited supplies (they shared one set of pencils between them) but with a loving heart and glad spirit.

 And, afterwards, we drive the "Bahai truck" that belongs to the Bahai center up and down the road through the community to drop the kids off. And so here's that photo:

*Pride and Prejudice Reference!
**Frog
***Chapter 16 is about the Martyrdom of the Báb, and chapter 17 starts out by telling how what happened in Zanján greatly saddened the Báb.
****Nobody has told me happy birthday yet!

A Food Fail; or, Feeding the Dog

I don't consider myself a really good cook. Certainly not as proficient as our in-house chef Rosita, who amazingly creates meals for 5 on a gas-powered mini-stove, with various pots and pans and a total of two cooking utensils. But, I do think I should be able to make a few things...which is why two days ago, my food escapades were embarassing.

The first embarrassment was more due to impatience than anything else. I got home from school walking 15 minutes in pouring rain, so I was wet and cold, and there wasn't a bunch of rice from when the others had eaten. So I decided to make soup from a packet. Not so hard, right? Well, maybe not if I had read the directions, which said dissolve the powder in COLD WATER. But I didn't, because the water we'd made for tea had already been heated. So the outcome was these gross, fetus-looking lumps. Oh joy.

Then we went to the institute, and to a community. And then we were starving, and had no food. Just flour, sugar, and cocoa. So we bought some eggs and decided to make chocolate pancakes.

The first batch was delicious. Perfecto! And we were so hungry it would have been good no matter what. But we were hungry afterwards. And in making the next batch, my hand slipped while putting in the salt. Which made the batter the most disgusting salty grossness I ever tasted. Even after adding more sugar, flour, etc? Still gross. We tried cooking it, trying to bake the salt out of it. Simple chemistry will tell you that that didn't work. The other thing was that with the added ingredients, we couldn't keep up the proportions with the eggs (we ran out) so the pancakes wouldn't flip properly.

Long story short, have you ever made incredibly salty scrambled pancakes? Not the most aesthetically pleasing, nor tasty. So we gave it to the dog that lives on our roof.

The dog's name is Aldoficio (or something similar). I haven't actually ever seen anyone besides me feed him (but he lives on the roof, so its kind of like, out of sight out of mind dog, except when he barks at intruders. And me.) and so maybe I shouldn't have been surprised when he gobbled up that salt grossness. Since then, I've taken pity on the poor dear, and will toss bread scraps/food that falls on the floor/leftovers up to him (consequently, he's stopped barking at me).

Hopefully, I will cook better in the future.*

* This is the future, and I am cooking better. Plus, some epiphanies like "Yoghurt and granola makes awesome breakfast" and "You can make french fries by just using oil and potatoes" has made our meals delicious!

I like colegio, really. Really.

Because some people (who will remain nameless) have talked about the fact that I have been slacking on my blogging duty. They've had to read other's blogs just to catch up on my life! So I've tried to remedy that.

And so I will talk about Colegio and the perils thereof.

Oh, Colegio

This, in a photo, is how I feel after every colegio class.

Colegio is duro. And for those of you who don't speak Spanish, that means HARD.  I am teaching 14 students from ages 12 to 17 basic level English. Basic level English means that most of the instruction needs to be in Spanish. So every Wednesday through Friday, I spend a few hours feeling like an idiot, trying to describe superlative adjectives, in Spanish, to my students.

And the students themselves are...okay. Some are very amazing. Some are really interesting people individually, and then they get into their little groups, and talk and talk and talk. And some still have problems staying in their own seats during class! Really, you'd think that by 8th grade you'd have mastered the idea of sitting down during class. Ergh.

I also had to learn an entirely new grading system. They use a scale of 1-20 here, and so I've had a self-taught crash course in Microsoft Excel, trying to average class scores and participation points and whatnot. It makes me miss Wasilla High's iParent, and I never, ever, ever thought I'd say that.

I also have some problems with materials. Its such a different atmosphere from the resource room at our public schools in America. There is no copier here. The students buy their own books (I'm still waiting, and begging, and ordering a few students in my class to GET THEIR FRIKIN BOOKS) and when I give tests (like this friday) they have to bring the 3 cents a copy it costs, individually. Which makes it hard to hand out lots of papers and teaching resources, like crossword puzzles and the like.

I think the hardest part is that I have to be mean. I have to take away their participation points when they talk. I have to say "Silencio, por favor" multiple times, sometimes multiple times to the same person. I have to give them a 10.33 (on a 20 point scale) when they never do their homework, show up to class late, and never even do their classwork. Grr...

Anyways, I'm looking into this as a challenge, a test that I'll have to overcome on my YOS. And, because I've been memorizing Hidden Words recently, here's some (in Spanish and English) that have helped me detach when I'm feeling frustrated and ineffective and annoyed...

O Son of Spirit! Ask not of Me that which We desire not for thee, then be content with what We have ordained for thy sake, for this is that which profiteth thee, if therewith thou dost content thyself.*

 

¡OH HIJO DEL ESPIRITÚ!
No Me pides lo que no deseamos para ti; conténtate, pues, con lo que hemos ordenado para ti, porque esto es lo que te beneficia si con ella te contententas.*


O Son of Man! For everything there is a sign. The sign of love is fortitude under My decree and patience under My trials.**

¡OH HIJO DEL HOMBRE!  Hay un signo para cada cosa. El signo del amor es la fortaleza en Mi decreto y la paciencia ante Mis pruebas.**

 
*Los Palabras Ocultas, número 18 del Árabe
**The Hidden Words,  #48 from the Arabic

The thing about sisters

Recently, some people, like Maryam and Elika, have talked about their siblings on their blogs (I recommend you read them.) And I was also talking about siblings with some other people recently. And it made me think about my sister, and how she's amazing.

If random people read my blog (and according to my stats, people from Japan, Brazil, and China read my blog, so I can assume they do) they may not know that I have a sister. I do. Her name is Cori, and she lives in Alaska, and she's the bestest sister in the world.

When people here ask me about my siblings, I tell them "Sí, tengo una hermanita que tiene 17 años." Their response is always "Chévere" which means "awesome", and its true. Having a sister is awesome. Especially when your sister is a speedy bandido on the Varsity State Champion XC running team, wears her sweatpants so low they're below her butt (luckily with shorts underneath), and made up her own dance to Mulan's "I'll Make A Man Out Of You" song.

I think Cori and I get along better on different continents. Because sometimes we fight, like most siblings do. We're not Lizzy and Jane (I mean, come on, Jane Austen, I love you, but that sisterly relationship is just not very realistic.) but we get on alright. Although she does eat all the cookie dough, and has some weird music tastes.

But the nice thing about being away from home, is that you get all nostalgic. Which means you remember the good times, like ukulele/random instrument jam seshes and watching Glee and sunbathing on the porch. And you forget just how annoying the annoying parts were. Recently, I've been maybe possibly feeling a bit of home queasiness (props to Elika for the word home-queasiness, which perfectly describes the state of feeling nostalgic and missing your family and home without actually having it negatively affect your life) and so this blog is a shout out to Cori. You're an awesome sister, even if you don't read my blog on a regular basis, or text other people whilst you're skyping me, or whatever. A llama will be coming in the mail for you, take it as a token of my appreciation for your sisterliness. Love you!

Most pictures are worth 1000 words; this one's worth a million.

Stories in the rain

Well, its been a bit since I blogged last, and since I have some time on my hands, kind of (WEIRD FEELING) I'll share some stories of Ecuador...

First, the atmosphere: I am wrapped up in an undershirt, shirt, sweater, coat, other coat, and scarf. And I'm inside. The buildings here aren't heated, which makes it very hard to get up on mornings like these, where the rain is constantly pattering on the metal roofs and you walk 15 minutes to the bus stop in this rain (thank goodness for my danskos, which are waterproof and raise my pants out of the puddles). The bell just rang for recreo (lunch/recess time) and now everyone, with assorted sweatshirts and coats diversifying the usual gray sweater uniform, is huddling under the eaves of the classrooms. The most common word I've heard today was "Ay chai chai" which is Quechua for "¡que frio!, this coming from every single student de jardín that rode the bus with me this morning. I plan on typing until I can't feel my fingers.

I have to say, though, I really like the weather here. Its really weird because it doesn't change seasonally...I keep expecting the leaves to turn or the rain to turn to snow, as I hear it is in Alaska. I like waking up in the morning and snuggling under a warm blanket with the air outside chilly. I like how it (usually) warms up during the day enough to be in a tshirt when I'm eating lunch with prebasica. I like how it gets dark at night, and the lights in downtown Otavalo come on. I even like the rain, because unlike Alaska, it only rains a day, or part of a day, and then stops.

Look! Mira! My prebasica kids are learning to color in the lines! They're also learning to count to ten in English. Today, we're writing our names and then learning to order numbers.


Other stuff: I am in love with where I live. There's this whole communal thing: Rosita, Maryam, and I share a room (Just washed the sheets today, YAY) and Mauro is next door (today we spent half an hour knocking back and forth on the wall to the delight of Kendy, the 3-almost-4 year old son of the family next door.) There are other people that share our same courtyard, including a 7 or 8 ish boy who talks to plants and encourages them to grow (only when people aren't watching. I was maybe spying out the window.) and Lovebird 1, who spends long long periods of time giggling and staring at Lovebird 2 on the stairs in front of our apartment (in perfect view from our bedroom. Spying is just so easy)

Its so wonderful to get home from a hard day at school to a huge lunch which has been prepared by Rosita, with Mauro, Belen, Wladimir, and Maryam all happy and relaxed. Its rejuvenating. Then, when in the afternoon, we walk to the Institute to do children's classes or to a community to talk with junior youth or whatever, I have energy. Its not as draining as school is for me.

Another mini-story: Yesterday was CRAZY. It was a Friday, so the kids were crazy. It was a full moon, so the kids were CRAZY. I had a class every single hour, so I was going CRAZY. And Maryam had a flu bug, so she wasn't there for me to rant at, which added to the CRAZY. (Maryam, I'm so glad you're here with me. So glad.) Anyways, the prebasica students started calling me Sophie. "Sophie! Sophie!"  they'd yell. And I'd stand there, hands on my hips, and say sternly "Mi nombre es VALERIE. Que es mi nombre?" and they'd say "Baleri" sheepishly, only to yell "Sophie! Sophie!" once again. I was really confused at first, thinking, how the heck to you get Sophie from Valerie? and then I realized Sophie was their teacher last year. So Sophie, wherever you are, those kids remember you!

I love the family that lives next door. José Luís and Jaconda live there with their two kids Doghma and Kendy. They are such a good example for a loving, functional family. From the joint meals (which they invite us to every once and a while) to the family jump rope sessions to making meals while listening to music and dancing in the kitchen, its just amazing to see the nurturing environment. And the results are so apparant: Kendy is definitely the most advanced English speaker in my prebasica class, and I can tell that he has creativity, social skills, and all around intelligence that's higher than his peers'. Doghma, too is the highest in her class (says Maryam) and has more patience than me, at 3rd grade level!

I love cooking. Our tiny kitchen somehow accommodates cooking for 5 or even 7...a feat I'm surprised at. Our oven is a storage area for flour, leftovers, and bananas (because we don't want the flies to get at them.) We have no measuring cups, so everything is kind of made up as mystery foods. I made pancakes, but didn't know how to describe baking powder (or baking soda) so they were very flat pancakes. I've learned to make some new foods, for instance mystery foods with Mauro:

Me: "¿Que haces? "
Mauro: "No sé"
Me: "¿Como haces?"
Mauro: "No sé"
Me: "Okay. Yum!"

Some days, we go out to eat at the Plaza de Ponchos. In the daytime, its a market: tons of brightly colored fabrics, llama fur stuff, hats, etc. In the evening, everything gets packed away and about 7 yellow tents spring up on one side of the square. In these tents, a family will cook meals, which are ridiculously cheap and ridiculously delicious. There is also a pie shop nearby, which is AMAZING. On most evenings that we eat at the Plaza de los Ponchos, we end the day walking around downtown at night. Its really fun...like mobile people-watching. At first I was surprised, I was like "Adonde vamos?" and Mauro replied "caminamos para caminar" along with a sound effect thats not really possible to put into words...its like psh, but different.

Jeez, I love walking, and having conversations that I only partly understand with Mauro, and talking about everything and anything (literally, from dog breeds to tv shows) with Wladimir. I love hanging out in the room with Rosita and Maryam. I love cooking and washing dishes, albeit with cold water. I love showing Kendy how to water Maryam's cactus, and having conversations through my open bedroom window about The Lion King with him. I love seeing Miguel, a difficult student in 2o de basica, respond to our "secret sign" (I pull my ear when he's doing something good, like sitting in his seat or engaged in class. recently, he's started pulling his ear at me too, like "hey, you're doing good as a teacher too!"). I really love it here. Really.

So thats some of my life. Super long post, but the nice thing about anecdotes? You don't even have to read them all.

The whole deal with toilet paper.

I just went to the bathroom.

Sorry if this grosses you out, but I thought I'd write about the experience, because the whole process is a bit different here.


First difference: here, you have to plan when you go to the bathroom. This is because every Starbucks, Walmart, and Sears (or the smaller, less commercialized equivalents here) don't have bathrooms. So if you're going on a walk, or shopping, there is a very good chance that you're just going to have to hold it for awhile.


Second difference: Toilet paper is not included. In some restaurants, where there is a bathroom, they provide you with "papel higiénico" in the form of a small dispensor in the hallway leading to the bathroom. At school, the office lady controls the "papel": you have to go and ask her to use some before heading off to the office bathroom (See: Awkward). In the classes, each teacher has a roll and when someone needs to go to the bathroom, they ask her/him for some papel. (my high school kids don't ask me for papel though, which kind of freaks me out...)


Third difference: Toilet seats, as it seems, are optional. For instance, for the first 3 weeks, my house didn't have a toilet seat. We solved that (see my other blog for photos) but a lot of public restrooms are without a toilet seat. Which is really really weird. Because I have become accustomed to bringing toilet paper around with me, but its very unrealistic to bring a toilet seat around with you (I tried fitting it in my backpack. No funciona.) So you just have to hover sometimes.


Fourth difference: The toilet paper cannot go down the toilet. So it goes into a little garbage can (hopefully with a lid) next to you. And smells after a few days. But the city picks up the trash every day except Sunday, so if you stay on top of it it doesn't smell too bad...


Fifth difference: The water pressure here is less...strong then in the states. So sometimes, you flush and nothing happens. I will never take a clean flush for granted again. However, there is some excitement with the whole flushing business because if you go to the southern hemisphere (for instance Quito, an hour and a half bus ride away) the water spins the other way. No joke. Here's proof:




So that's toilets. Something I would really love to change, but its all part of the experience, right?